I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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