the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
