this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
