he thought i was a dude.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
And then the night went full on bisexual.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
