I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
