At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
