You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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