I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
