A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I enjoy the company of your penis
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
