Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
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he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
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It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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