I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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