i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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