I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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