Screwed.edu
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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