quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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