I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
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You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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