It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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