Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
