whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
