hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?