I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
