so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
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