He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize