I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize