I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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