oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize