His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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