the new term for farting is butt boxing.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
