how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
