Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.