Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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