i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM