where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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