Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Randomize
