I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
