So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Randomize
