check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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