Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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