erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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