but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
