She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
40s are totally the cure
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize