You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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