You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
