Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
