Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
