So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
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