i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
