What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize
