I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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