I think i sorta joined a cult last night
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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