hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
