you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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