Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
