I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
